My 26th birthday was this past monday, and unfortunately I’m therefore one year older. With this annual celebration behind me, I can’t help but wonder if I’m any wiser?
I’ve been here and there and along the way I’ve had some great times, but I’ve also made some rather catastrophic errors in judgement. From this lengthy list of horrible decisions, epic fails, and random successes I have compiled a list of rules that everyone should probably live by.
I have divided these into four categories: Food, Body Alterations, Transportation, and Customs.
-Eating meals that cost less than a dollar in a developing country is not advisable
-NEVER EAT the seafood when refrigeration is unavailable
-In fact, NEVER EAT the seafood from a cart on the side of the road
-Always have at least three servings of fruit a day
BODY ALTERATIONS (ELECTIVE OR OTHERWISE)
-Never have surgery in a foreign country, especially not on your ass in South Korea
-Getting a tattoo in the jungle using only bamboo can turn out quite well, but use your judgement
-If you’re trying to hitch hike always smile, people don’t want to pick up someone who is sad
-When hitch hiking across America be sure to tell people that you are planning to hitch hike across America, otherwise they might file a missing persons report when you don’t phone anyone for 9 days
-Hitching across America is extremely feasible and is in fact both cheaper, faster and more comfortable than taking the greyhound bus
-Your appearance and odour while hitching should be rugged enough so that no predators would consider you an appetizer
-Vintage motorcycles can cross thousands of kilometres of barren wasteland if only you believe… and have enough fuel
-Don’t train for a trans Canada cycling trip by going to weddings, bachelor parties and eating cake
-Never fly to England at Christmas time
-Always pack more than just your toothbrush in your carry on luggage, otherwise be prepared to wear another person’s clothes for a month
-Always declare all your alcohol at the border, they will catch you and red flag your passport for six years. They do not mess around
What does the 27th year of my life hold in store? Who knows, but I’m certainly excited to find out so long as it isn’t surgery on my bum again.